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The Skhool for Parents: Helping Parents Love Their Teenagers
| Article
# : |
12957 |
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Section : |
LIFE
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| Issue
Date : |
5 / 1987 |
2,689 Words |
| Author
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Paula Steen
Paula Steen has taught in Germany and America for the past
fourteen years. She now resides in New Haven, Connecticut, and
is a staff writer for a business journal. |
"Your room is a garbage pit. Clean it up NOW!"
"I won't have a kid with purple hair in my house!"
"You told me you'd be in at midnight and now it's 2:30!"
Do these comments sound familiar? Then you must be the parent of a teenager. If you are, you may need a little help in getting through the next few years.
Good parenting can be learned. The Skhool for Parents is one of many resource groups around the country that provide programs and information to parents coping with the trials of living with teenagers.
Founded in 1985 by child psychiatrist William Koch at the Lenox Hill Hospital in New York City, the Skhool creates a relaxed social setting where parents can meet each other and share their concerns.
The Skhool's five-session Basic Course and its three-session Adolescence Course give concrete guidelines that participants can begin using right away. After completing the courses, parents receive continued support and advice at monthly "Share Shop" meetings.
"Going through the course was like giving myself a gift," said Arthur Celedonia, a graphic artist. He is often left in charge of his fifteen-and thirteen-year-old daughters due to his wife's frequent business trips. "I felt I was beginning to lose control when Miriam, our eldest, was about thirteen," he said. "I wanted to hear what other parents were saying about getting along with their children."
The Skhool for Parents acknowledges that need for "peer group" interaction and has structured its sessions accordingly. To help them unwind, the participants are treated to refreshments and snacks before sessions. After Koch's half-hour lecture focusing on parental concerns, there's a snack break - another opportunity for the parents to interact - followed by a question-and-answer session.
Encouraging Responsibility
"The major issue of adolescence is independence," he tells parents. "You must gradually expand the limits you have set to give teenagers increasing
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